Letters & Biographies

Letter from Kara

April 23, 2010

First of all, I would like to say I absolutely adore your web site. I have gotten so many ideas from here that I use in my own life with my diaper wearing boyfriend. This leads me to the reason for this letter. It seems a lot of men out there are desperately looking for that special woman to put them in their place, but are not having much luck. So, I thought I would share my experience and perhaps offer a bit of advice on finding a willing woman of their own.

Before you can find a woman that will accept your fetish, you need to accept it yourself. By this, I don’t mean you need to admit to having a fetish or something stupid like that. I mean you need to figure out how much a part of your life is this fetish. You may think it would be awesome to be diapered and dominated as a way of life, but this will alienate any accepting women you do meet and is probably not even possible in your own life. The vast majority of women you meet want a strong man that can give them what they want most of the time. Perhaps being the man of the house during the week and diapered slave on the weekends is a more reasonable lifestyle. Just ask yourself which is better; never finding a woman to accept you and your fetish OR finding a woman that will give you what you want a couple weekends a month?

That being said, like in any relationship you need to focus on her needs. Take the time to find out what she likes and give it to her. Perhaps she has a fetish of her own or simply wants to be wined and dined often. Simple things like backrubs and telling her how much she means to you will go a long way in opening her up to your needs. If you make her happy, she will work to make you happy. It really is as simple as that. Also, when you are being diapered and dominated, you still need to focus on her needs. If you give her an amazing massage every time she puts you in a diaper, she will begin to see diapering you as a pleasurable experience. If you clean the house spotless every time she stuffs a plug up your butt… well you get the picture.

Now that you know how to keep a woman, the real trick is to find one. Depending on how social you are, this can be easy or difficult. Don’t focus on finding a woman that is advertising for a diapered submissive. Find a women elsewhere and then introduce her to your fetish. No need to be scared in my opinion. Most women are fairly open minded. I read a lot from the ABDL community about their significant others being turned away by their fetish, but I think most of those failures could have been successes if those guys had followed what I already said. Make her happy and she will be receptive. If she is merely content in your relationship, she will probably not be open to bizarre fetishes. If she is ecstatically happy, however, she will most likely do whatever it takes to keep the relationship alive.

I speak from experience, as you may have guessed. When my boyfriend first told me about his fetish, I was freaked out. I even contemplated leaving him, but the rest of our relationship was so incredibly awesome I couldn’t bring myself to do it. After dabbling in his fetish, to make him happy, I began to enjoy it. The control I had over him made our relationship even stronger and I had never been happier. Now I can’t even remember what a relationship was like without having the option of diaper punishing my man.

In closing I would just like to wish all the men out there looking for that special someone good luck. Open your minds and your hearts and you will find the woman of your dreams that will accept you for who you are.

~Kara

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