The following is a mostly true account of my life in diapers. I say mostly, because it’s impossible to remember every single detail or verbatim conversations. Overall, however, it is pretty much accurate.
My desire for diaper dominance started during puberty. I don’t recall ever having any desire for diapers before then, so it is my belief that my desires began at that point. We lived in a fairly tight community mobile home park at that time and our next door neighbor was a single mother with three boys. The middle boy was my age and had a well known bedwetting problem, which made him the butt of many jokes from the neighborhood kids. Both of his brothers teased him non-stop and made sure everyone was aware that he wore diapers to bed at night.
Being an empathetic person even at that young age, I refused to tease him and instead became his friend. Like most friends, we hung around each other quite often and had the occasional sleepover. When he slept over at my house, he would go home a bit before bed time and come back wearing his pajamas which covered his diaper underneath. On nights I slept at his house, his mother was far less discreet and would simply walk into the room at bedtime with a diaper in her hand and get him dressed for bed. I remember once asking him why he didn’t just put it on himself and he told me it was because he always did it wrong.
Witnessing my friend’s humiliations had an effect on my puberty stricken mind. My body was just beginning to experience sexual feelings and something in my brain linked up to make me think of this humiliation in a sexual way. The first time I masturbated to orgasm I was imagining that I was in his place, being diapered by his mother and sent to play outside with the other kids as they pointed at my diapered butt and called me names. As time passed and puberty progressed, my fantasies grew to include kidnapping, bondage, spanking and messy diapers.
Before long I was no longer content to just fantasize as I masturbated. I stole several baby diapers from a neighbor and taped them together to make one larger diaper that would fit me. It didn’t fit well, but it was enough to strengthen my desires. During my junior year in high school, I worked as an assistant in the nurse’s office one period a day. It was then that I found a large case of Attends in the supply closet. They were there for the sizable disabilities class at my school, but it was a jackpot for me. I snuck a few of the diapers home in my backpack and the very first time I tried on a diaper that was actually designed to fit me, I had an orgasm just from the feel of taping it up. Over the next couple school years, I probably absconded with half the large case of Attends. I’m guessing the nurse just assumed the disabled kids were using them, because she never said anything about it.
After high school I ran into education problems. My parents made too much money for financial aid, but not enough to actually pay my way through school. So, rather than going straight to a university, I had to get a job and pay my own way through community college first. At this point, the stress of adulthood was taking it’s toll and my fantasies were the only thing that kept me grounded.
Now being an adult, I was able to visit adult bookstores where I searched through used ‘letters’ magazines for anything diaper related. It was then that I stumbled across an adult personals magazine. There were tons of personals from people looking for partners for all sorts of activities. This fueled me with a new idea to post a personal ad looking for someone interested in diaper dominance. The ad I posted explained my desires and I even included a photo, which in hindsight was probably not the greatest idea. I got two letters from men telling me if I ever got tired of searching for a woman to fill my needs to give them a call, but no responses from females for several months. Just when I was about to give up, I got a letter from a genuine woman that seemed interested.
We exchanged letters for a few weeks to get to know each other and she explained that she only responded to my ad because I had posted it so many times. Turns out she was not an attractive woman and assumed an eighteen year old boy like me wouldn’t be interested in an overweight fifty year old woman. When I explained that looks didn’t matter in my fantasies, she was eager to meet.
Her name was Mary and she was a semi-retired nurse that worked part time at a hospice. She was widowed with no children and owned a fairly large house in a rural area about fifty miles north of where I grew up. In our correspondence, she had explained that she had a thing for poop and a diapered boy would be a great addition to her household. At first I wasn’t sure what to think, because a messy diaper sounded great but if she expected anything messier than that I wasn’t interested. She explained that changing messy diapers and giving the occasional enema is all she expected, so I decided to chance it and agreed to meet her for a weekend trial period.
We agreed on some simple guidelines; My only requirement was no publically visible diapers. Being diapered in public was fine, as long as I was wearing pants to cover the diapers. Her rules were derived from the fantasy stories I had written. No changing my own diapers, no toilet usage without permission and complete obedience. That first weekend was almost a scripted copy from some of my written fantasies.
When I arrived at her house, she invited me in and we made official introductions. Then, she started off with a warning spanking to ensure I knew who was in charge. She pulled my pants and underwear off and admonished me for not being diapered when I arrived. I was pulled across her lap and received a moderate introductory spanking. Hard enough to hurt, but not enough to scare me off.
After the spanking, she showed me to my room where she had a stack of diapers waiting on top of the dresser. She grabbed one of the thicker than normal hospice diapers And placed it under my butt and taped it around my waist. The rest of the day was fairly uneventful. She put me to work doing laundry and other chores while she asked me the occasional question like when I usually had my daily constitutional(bowel movement). When she asked me to tell her BEFORE my next bowel movement, I was almost ready to leave out of fear of what type of disgusting idea she had about my bowel movement.
Regardless of my fear, a few hours later I felt one coming on and I told her so. She just sat on the couch and asked me lay across her lap in the spanking position. Once in position, she put her hand on the seat of my diaper and insisted I do my business. It seemed odd, but at least she wasn’t asking me to shit on her chest. It was difficult to poop in this position, so after a few minutes she asked if I needed a suppository. I told her no, but she insisted if I hadn’t made a mess in five minutes she was getting them anyway. I tried as hard as I could, but was unsuccessful and when time was up she reached into the side table and retrieved a small jar of suppositories. Without any lube, she snaked her hand through the leg band of my diaper and slid two suppositories into my ass. She left her finger in position for several minutes explaining she needed to make sure they had a chance to work. I started to cramp up and the urge to poop became unbearable. Despite the weird positioning that had prevented me from pooping before, as soon as she removed her hand from my diaper my bowels erupted into the diaper. I glanced over my shoulder to see a huge smile spread across Mary’s face. She then turned on the television and we watched it for a couple hours in this position. The entire time she was spreading the mess all around inside my diaper.
Around bed time, she guided me into my bedroom where she grabbed a clean diaper and took her time cleaning up the mess she has spread all over my diaper area. Once I was in a clean diaper, she put me to bed and left the room with my messy diaper. A few minutes later I heard the unmistakable sound of a woman masturbating. I don’t know for sure if she was using my dirty diaper as a masturbation tool, but after what I had experienced it was assumed yes.
Despite my feelings about her interest in poop, it was mostly a dream come true. Being kept in diapers and punished as she saw fit was exactly what I was looking for. I had never been so happy and neither had she. After only one weekend, we both agreed to make it permanent. I went back home for a week to tell my parents I had gotten a job up north and was moving into a boarding house while I finished school. Mary insisted that I continue my college education and even offered to pay for it while I lived there. This freed me from the need for a part time job to pay for tuition, but Mary made sure to put me to work doing all of the daily house and yard work.
At home, I wore only a diaper and a t-shirt – even when doing yard work. Her house was off the beaten path, but there was still the occasional car that would pass by. At school, I was still diapered but wore loose fitting slacks to cover the bulge somewhat. Some of my classmates could still tell I was diapered, but they probably assumed it was a disability problem and thus never said anything to me.
Over time, Mary expanded on our situation. She began collecting paddles and enema nozzles and eventually started using butt plugs to control my bowel movements. She would plug me up for most of the day, until I was clearly in need of a bowel movement, then pull the plug and enjoy my bowel movement in her own way. Occasionally, she wasn’t willing to wait for nature to take it’s course, so she would give me a sizable enema and have me release it into the diaper. She also had a fondness for the smell, so I spent a lot of time doing my chores in an extra messy diaper. Because of this, she took great care to prevent diaper rash.
This all started over six years ago and we still live the good life today. Someday Mary will be too old to continue, but until then we’re having great fun!